Skip to main content

So, Today...

So today, i opened my eyes.
I looked at the life past, how time goes on without a care, no matter how we wished it would stop. As we laughed, as we enjoyed each other's company, we prayed under the gleaming sun and the mocking moon that time would halt. But it won't

I opened my ears.
I listened. To the quiet screams of the lives that are not, to the silence of the bench. I listened to the beating of my own hearts, to the silent cries of my own being. "Enough", it said. And i listened.

I tried to touch.
I tried holding on to whichever ropes that lie near, only to realize i was holding on to nothing.  A strong rope that doesn't connect to anything. What use does it have?

I stopped it.
Everything must come to a halt. But some does so reluctantly, and those are the heaviest. So i took the weight and force it to my back. Because by doing that, i'd get stronger. And sometimes the weight feels painful. And i get weaker. But in doing so, i get stronger still.

So, today i feel everything.
To let go of things that are out of my control. To make sure that i have done all i need to. To feel again, that life exists in me and all around me.

And today, i feel alive.

But do i want to?

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Danshi Kokosei No Nichijou (Daily life of a highschool boy) part 1

The title is a total rip-off from an awesome comedy anime with the same title, but im not here to talk about it or preach about how awesome the series was. No, im here share a bit about my past. Well, without further ado, here's my (long past) highschool life!! So here in Indonesia, the term highschool is separated into two, which is junior and senior high. My junior was at a pretty small, cramped, sometimes very smelly, yet nostalgic school in Jakarta called P7. I go to that school mainly because my primary was close by, and like most people, because my older sibling went there. Come to think about it, i was rather social in primary school. I was in good relation with most people. But it all changed when the fire nation attacked (meme joke here sorry cant help it). Junior high was, quite frankly, rough and has a rather huge impact to what i am now. Starting off, you could slowly see, with your biased view, that people are starting to become more of a jerk. Bullying is very much ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Poetic Sh*t

55 days, few hours and minutes. I’ve been alive for 20 years, but I have just breathe my first. Heart is a fickle thing, no man knows it for its entirety, yet many boast to be able to understand other’s. human lie about things they feel. In fact, humans lie about mostly everything. How hard is it to tell people a string of word that is not. How hard it is to make people hate you, to make you hate them. How much lies and deceit one must do to be able to lie to themselves, as they did to others. I am no liar, but that is what a liar always say. I am no sage, nor am I a holy man. I am but a humble soul withstanding, waiting, hoping, seeking for the truth. Those which are not told by humans, those that sparked war, hatred, tears, and agony, and those that make people smile and hope for nothing. I have discovered and is convinced, that there is simply too much lies in this world, that there is no other way to discover truth other than laying aside all lies that exist. I am no monster, ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Late night rant

So. HELLO THERE!! I'm back from a rather long hiatus (not that it's a regular blog anyway). Let's cut right to the chase, shall we? What do you think about when you hear the word "miserable"? Do you think of that poor boy begging for a penny on the sidewalk? Or a sick old man that has nothing left but his last few breaths? What is miserable? And why does feeling miserable is undesirable? Mind you, this still is a rant so it's really not dictionary or professionally checked. But i think, feeling miserable is a necessary emotion. Even knowing that someone else is miserable is actually a good sign.. in a way. Miserable is that feeling when you see that people around you are moving at a pace faster than you, you get left behind, but is still pushed by your conscience to catch up to them, which u probably could, but will probably tire you out. Miserable is closely linked to envy, which in my case actually describes a lot of things about me, things i want to forget...
Post a Comment
Read more